Why can’t I concentrate today?
My browser crashed and I deleted all of my passwords and all of my history. So much porn lost to posterity. I doubt I have the wank-power to recover all the links again.
I have arthritis in my knees. Would have thought it should have struck the right wrist years ago and only a matter of time before my jaw starts clicking! If only I had insured against repetitive strain injury as a teenage rent boy.
Oh yes; back to my concentration. It is shot; which is more than can be said for me. That’s the problem – I need to ‘tug the junk to de-spunk’ and then normal service will be resumed.
The clues were there all of the time. I have Recon and Fabguys open beeping with a constant stream of messages that herald the arrival of another fetish scene or dick-pic. Alongside me, on the table, my phone is demanding my attention as I get notification sounds from Grindr.
OMG! That image has to have been photo-shopped. No, he really can go down that far on a traffic cone. Why would you do that? What chance would my tiny todger have to make an impression? Why did I open the 2nd image? Once the traffic cone is removed he has a bum hole like a chewed Orange, an old golf bag or a Wizards sleeve. That didn’t help at all, just left me with a flaccid member.
“Once the traffic cone is removed he has a bum hole like a chewed Orange, an old golf bag or a Wizards sleeve”.
Please, Headmaster put me out of my misery. I see you think I deserve a spanking. Well, of course, it might help, but we usually save those sorts of treats for a Sunday afternoon when the neighbour goes out for her afternoon walk. You know how the swish of the cane and my yelping in pain sets her miniature poodle off.
Ninety-nine change hands and; better mop that up with a tissue or two.
Now, where was I? Understanding thermonuclear gigawatt converters and their use in a DeLorean or Tardis for beginners…
Disillusioned and back in the closet man who likes other men.
Strongly opinionated, possibly outdated. Genuine, cynical, candid and consider I have a humourous outlook.
Older than acceptable in Gay circles, larger of frame than is fashionably desirable.
Looking for a platform to share my views and listen to others
Opinions expressed in this article may not reflect those of THEGAYUK, its management or editorial teams. If you'd like to comment or write a comment, opinion or blog piece, please click here.