10. Preoccupation with Death.
Does your friend now talk about ending things more frequently (most of us joke about it at times)? Are they becoming more focused on a particular problem which is talked about repeatedly? Have they written a letter? Have they got a plan? When people start planning, they are potentially upping the ante. They need help, so get them some if they are unable to.
Above all, offer your friends some kindness and some interest. Do what you say you’re going to do. Be there. Treat people how you expect to be treated. Life can be rough for us all. Someone once said that growing older is not for the faint-hearted, and there is some truth to this. The best thing though is about making sure, wherever possible, you’re not doing it alone.
Andrew is the clinical director of TherAppUK Ltd, an organisation based in Greater Manchester that provides a range of therapeutic solutions to individuals, families, and groups. He is also a doctoral researcher at the University of Huddersfield, and lives in the Calder Valley with his partner, Nigel, their son, a neurotic Chihuahua called Chicky, and two cats. If you have any urgent concerns about your own or someone else’s emotional health, please call 999 or NHS Direct. If this is a matter that can wait until one of our therapists can call you back, please email Andrew on andrew.smith@therapp.org
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